Surprise Attack Book Club 4! This is just a tribute!
Read along with us: Broken Sky Part Four by Chris Wooding What's this?! Surprise Attack! You aren't ready! Surprise Attack! We're reading, we're chatting, and we're bringing you with us on this adventure whether you want to or not! Try to follow Swan (@aSwanNamedEmily), Tim (@remobware), Jenna (@JennaChil - WITH ONE 'L'), and Alex (@AlexandBirds). This is not the greatest podcast in the world. This is just a tribute.
Alpha Alex (@QuidRoll / @AlphaComicGames) has finally admitted what we all suspected the whole time. Alpha Alex has written an Animorphs fanfic about being a tuna, and we need to find it. In the mean time enjoy this slam poetry:
He does not like it. Tim-he-is.
He does not like it, it is too big.
He sees the cover of this book.
The lady is so big he is shook.
New episode every other Wednesday!
Welcome to Jenna and Alex's epic vampire journey through the coffins of friendship, the spooky castles of nostalgia, ve vant to drink your bluud Tim ah ah ah! Ok so this isn't Horse Girls per se.... but it IS Hearse Girls!!
Tim really loves these books. Like he REALLY loves them. This is his favorite book series ever. He is team Jacob but we can't hold that against him.
If you like this ep consider hitting us up at patreon.com/horsegirls
Surprise Attack Book Club 3! Rancfour art thou?
Read along with us: Broken Sky Part Three by Chris Wooding What's this?! Surprise Attack! You aren't ready! Surprise Attack! We're reading, we're chatting, and we're bringing you with us on this adventure whether you want to or not! Try to follow Swan (@aSwanNamedEmily), Tim (@remobware), Jenna (@JennaChil - WITH ONE 'L'), and Alex (@AlexandBirds) as Tim brings us some easy listening podcast radio, and the rest of us may be having a stroke.
Alpha Alex (@QuidRoll / @AlphaComicGames) comes at us with a warm face cloth in this episode! She buffs away the delusions we suffer of what the Shifter looks like with the rough dollar tree 90s facecloths of truth! Tim tried to jump of the stairs but he's older than normal so Alex totally caught him and wrestled him down. Enjoy this unicorn trip down memory lane!
New episode every other Wednesday!
Unicorn girl Alpha Alex (@QuidRoll / @AlphaComicGames) continues to delight us! In this episode she outlines her 9 step plan to raze Celestia to the ground if anyone hurts her favorite cottage gore Unicorn Nana. Meanwhile Tim is spouting out his freaking moon conspiracy theories again and going on about his bone theories!! Then Tim horrifies Alpha Alex with baby horse hooves, it is entirely Tim's fault. It had nothing to do with the rest of us. Only Tim. This is entirely Tim's fault. Please blame ONLY Tim. Literally how are we going to keep Alpha Alex if you keep acting like this?
New episode every other Wednesday!
Listen being a Horse Girl is one thing but a Unicorn Girl is a whole other glory err.... story, so we had to bring in the big guns for this one. Welcome Alpha Alex (@QuidRoll / @AlphaComicGames) as she joins us to teach Tim the ways of the Unicorns through Unicorns of Balinor! Let this podcast be the mysterious salve that fixes all your woes.
New episode every other Wednesday!
Have you ever known one man to cause so much pain, so much horror, so much... just MUCH as John Steinbeck? No me either. If you want to find evil approaching the level of Sugarfoot then look no further than the man who penned The Red Pony. Probably with the blood of a thousand foals.
New episode every other Wednesday!
Guess what happens when you do an endothermic reaction. EXPLOSIONS! OF HAY! HAY EVERYWHERE! In this episode we set into your minds the mouldy hay of an idea where it will EXPLODE! WITH GREAT POWER! FIRE EVERYWHERE! CHAOS! Wait no... no this was a good thing. We were being positive. TIM HELP! I went to the explosion place again....
New episode every other Wednesday!
What's this?! Surprise Attack! You aren't ready! Surprise Attack! We're reading, we're chatting, we're bringing you with us on this adventure whether you want to or not! Try to follow Swan (@aSwanNamedEmily), Tim (@remobware), Jenna (@JennaChil - WITH ONE 'L'), and Alex (@AlexandBirds) to hear when we strike again! Read along with us: Broken Sky Part One by Chris Wooding
EXTRA! EXTRA! Read all about it! There's been THEFT! Around Horse Girls HQ! The crime rate is THROUGH THE ROOF! I don't want to imply Tim is the thief but I feel as though I would be remise if I didn't say the only person we didn't have eyes on at all times was TIM and now my printer is MISSING!!! How am I supposed to print out my word docs now TIM. WHERE'S THE CYAN! THE MAGENTA? Yellow is inexplicably present...
New episode every other Wednesday!
Welcome to Jenna and Alex's epic equestrian journey through the trails, pastures, and rings of nostalgia as they attempt to turn Tim into a full-fledged Horse Girl! Or is it- Alex's time to turn Jenna and Tim into Hadestown fans?
Way down Horsestown
Way down around the town
Max's howl and Ms. Reg tale
Topside come a-rollin, clippety-Clop
Saddle club tryin' to get a ticket to go
Those who go they don't come back
They goin' way down Horsestown
New episode every other Wednesday!
Well, well, well if it isn't a well. Tim flew in from Milwaukee and his arms are very tired. We wrote about it in the New York Times but Comanche didn't read it. Because he gets the Washington Post! Hahaha. Ha. These jokes are very good. Ha. They are SO GOOD.
New episode every other Wednesday!
Today we talk about the BAR-NONE RANCH! BAR-NONE! THE BAR-NONE RANCH!!!! Also there's a lot of sad dog stuff. At the BAR-NONE RANCH! C'mon! You get it right? Right? Besides that- Stevie. Who hurt you? Like for real, why did you think no one would remember your birthday? Ok. I have stayed on topic long enough, to the podcast!
New episode every other Wednesday!
Once he's been bitten and twice he's shied
Tim keeps his distance, but Sugarfoot catches his eye
Tell me lil' horsie, do you recognize me?
Well, it's been a year, it doesn't surprise me...
Did we talk about the important stuff today on Horse Girls? Yes. We talk about the perfect nipple shade. Do you know what that means? Of course you do, the only person in the entire world that doesn't know what that means is Tim. Obviously. OBVIOUSLY!
New episode every other Wednesday!
Did you know Tim has never seen the Devil Wears Prada? Like who hasn't seen that movie? It's great! I mean Andi took a really interesting character arc that was multi faceted and the cast is just star studded. Stanley Tucci is in it! Meryl Streep! Oh, I'm supposed to be writing an episode description? Oh no. Well... uhh... horses n' stuff! Yeah. Nailed it. 5 stars.
New episode every other Wednesday!
Come along and ride with us on this very special episode where we have a blast talking with the people that have come into our lives and we just cannot live without now. Our very special guests include:
Austin Chaudoin - @SeezyDrop
Alex -@QuidRoll / @AlphaComicGames
And Shannon - You're going to have to solve a series of Tim Riddles...
We appreciate you all and have a wonderful holiday!
You ever wanted a tight 5 on simple machines? Well great news- it's impossible. Find out why from our very own pulley up comedian Jenna! Also, we pitch a few new idea for you, just wait until you hear what we're about to do with the Googley eyes! Wow!
New episode every other Wednesday!
Come along and ride with us as we read the spooOOoooOOOkiest story! Jenna comes up with a brand new cryptid: Ghosteyote. Coming soon to a dusty valley near you in the middle of the night. When you are alone. In the woods. You hear a howl in the night, then Jenna darts away like an antelope...
New episode every other Wednesday except this week you get this extra one as a treat but also as a trick!